I write to you as a fool,
today I wish I was blind.
I wish love didn't hurt.
I wish tears satisfied. 
I wish soul mates evaporate.

I hate marriage.
I hate friends.
I envy life,
for it has 
forsaken me...

To love one with all 
your heart,
at the wrong time
for him,
not me,
cause i'm following my heart,
and not my mind. 
Damn, it hurts so bad inside...
Hell,
maybe he's following his
heart too or his mind...
and its just not me.

I wonder if he truly loves the one 
that he loved first...
but I know that isn't the case,
for I've seen the smiles of 
happiness all over his face,
when "wifey" is by his side...

And then i'm disgruntled with another
not wanting a touch, him
to be in sight or hear a sound...
living in house with all this rain,
is the most miserable pain,
that life could bring.

I want happiness,
I want love,
I want affection,
I want passion,
I want kisses,
I want satisfaction...
I want,
no I need him. 

Life has hurt me
more than anything
imaginable....
And the truth
of reality is,
is the one that I love 
makes me happy,
takes away the pain,
and brings sunshine to the rain,
leaving a rainbow,
is happy.

He is happy,
living his life,
without me,
day to day.
I'm a fool 
cause I stopped living. 
I'm waiting on my rainbow...

He is still the love
of my life,
my soul mate,
my king...
but more realistically
the closest he'll be 
to me is in my dreams.

Unless life ends my rainy days...
or am I just a fool in love, 
or fooled by love?