Darn, I don't know why people are so mad at me. 
Oh, sorry, I forgot to introduce myself. My name is Max. I 
am quite big and young guy who likes pretty girls. I wish 
they had the same feelings about me too.... 

It all began at high school. At age of fifteen I 
already felt very horny about the girls. My mother always 
told me "Be natural, be yourself". So I did. In the 
morning the classes had begun. First in my life, I have 
got B for algebra which I hated the most. However, the 
teacher of such subject was different. She was nubile. So, 
she came to me and put my test assignment list on my 
desk saying "Congrutalation Max, now you are really 
showing some progress". I was so delighted that I said "Oh 
yes baby. But you know, if you just take off your bra and 
shake your boobies in front of me, that would be so 
cool!". I immediately recieved large slap in my face and 4 
months of detention! But I didn't do anything wrong! I 
swear.

In one summer day, I was at birthday party of one old man 
who used to be a grandfarther of my friend. There was a 
lot of food. I immediately grabbed large portion of 
spagetti and began devouring it. Strange, but my friend 
seemed not very enthusiastic about the food at all. Most 
of the time, when I ate the food he looked at me with 
horror on his face. Meanwhile, I began eating the entire 
turkey. For some reason, not only my friend but the rest 
of other guests tried to take it away from me. But I was 
hungry and loved torkey! Then, it was the time for toast. 
I immediatly raised from my chair with big bottle of 
takilla in my left hand and said: " So you are 86 years 
old grammy. You are very old bastard who has nothing to 
do, but rubbing his scruffy ass, farting, and shaking his 
half dried stinky testicles. And you still think that 
girls around the town would think that you are sexy? 
Stinky, dumb, asshole. You are..."
I had not finished. Those guys simply kicked me out of the
house and told me to stay away from it and my friend. What 
was not really good that my friend after that refused to 
be my friend. He was simply ashamed by me. But I was not 
sorry for myself. In contrary, I was very sorry for my 
silly friend and his relatives. If I were him, I would 
kick my grand farther's ass and tell him pointing the 
finger right in his right eye "You fucko, respect my 
friend".

When I finished high scool, I was serving in the army. I 
thought that would be cool, but I was wrong. What the 
hell? No cheeks, no boobies, and you have to wake up early 
in the morning. This didn't look like the real army at 
all. I still can't forget that day when I was badly beaten 
by the sergeant. It was in the early morning when I with 
the rest of our solders had gathered in the row. Sergent 
was standing right in front of us. 
"Rise up!! Turn left, right. Freeze!" yelled that darn 
asshole.
Suddenly I began laughing. Sergeant immediately came to 
me "What are you laughing at, moron?" 
So, I said what I thought " You know, sergeant, I just 
wonder if someone puts hunch of powder in your underwear 
and you put it on, how well you will pi-pi after that? It 
would surely be kind of unpleasantly pricky isn't it 
sergeant isn't it? Ha-ha-ha!"
O,k. I was mercilessly beaten up in front of other solders.

Nobody of them came to protect me. And they call 
themselves army guards. Shame on them!

Oh, I just don't understand. I think I did everything 
right. At least 80% right. So, why is it happening to me? 
Why don't people like me? It is not fair, not fair I am 
telling you!