I remember the times
They are stuck in my memories
I can see the pictures
As if they were glued onto the inside of my eyelids
Every time I close my eyes I see them 

As clear as daylight

I can hear your voice

It recorded itself in my mind

Every night before I rest my head and close my tired eyes

I can hear it

Whispering

Talking 

Screaming

I hear it
I remember your interests

I turn around

Left, right

Right, left

I see something that resembles you 

I remember everything

I remember every part of you

Inside out

As if I had just seen it two minutes ago

But that’s not possible is it

And I want to forget

But all I do is remember

Why?

How come every picture I see, every smell I inhale, every
place that I go

I remember you

I don’t get it

What did I do to deserve this?

I know 

Confusing

Would think that remembering my dad

My father

I would feel glad, joyful, or tranquil

But I don’t

I don’t feel glad, or joyful, and especially not calm

I feel irritated

Betrayed

I feel sad

And angry
I feel broken

I was daddy’s little girl

And he left

He just left me

No sign

No clue

No reason

When I got home one evening, he just wasn’t there

That’s why I feel how I feel 

‘Cuz he took my happiness with him

He took it for himself

And without my permission

As a memory?

Just to bug me?

For no reason?

I don’t know

And to be truthful

I don’t care

No matter the reason

He still took it

And it wasn’t his to take

Because stealing has its consequences

It has its price

And the consequence for you taking my happiness

Is much worse than pain

It’s much worse than suffering

It’s much worse than hate

Your price is me feeling nothing for you

Absolutely nothing

Not hate

That only hurts me

Not love

That makes no sense

Not indifference

That’s just confusing

Not understanding

Because I don’t understand

Not even close

Feeling nothing is what I feel for you

It’s the perfect emotion

The right feeling

I don’t want to feel betrayed, or sad, or angry

You’re not worth it

Not even one bit

So why would I hurt myself

When I’m trying to hurt you

There’s no point
So I went searching

I went looking deep inside myself

To change my train of thought

To change the way I felt

And luckily,

My effort was not futile

I found what I was looking for

I found what I was seeking for since you left

I discovered nothingness

And now that I feel nothing

I am going to try to regain my happiness

The happiness you took was the real thing

But if I trick myself

Of I pretend I have my real happiness back

And not a replacement

I think I could forget

I think I could forget that you took something I most
treasured

I could forget your face

I could forget your voice

I could forget your interests

I could forget you

And I think that’s the cure
To pretend

And to rebuild my happiness

Wow….

What an epiphany

And I am so eager to start

I just can’t wait

I don’t want to remember anymore

I don’t want to feel the sting

So why not start now?

I’m too impatient

So let me begin

I’m happy

I’m joyful

I’m elated

I’m glad

And who is that guy again?