By Loneliness is condescending •
Current vote: 4.0 / 5
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I love it. I love how you have opposites like a strait line of circles and silent tune of screams. Thats amazing, it works well.
This is very good. I have read a few of your pieces and you are a good writer. Have you joined a writing site? I have joined Writing.com It's a good site and I get a lot of feedabck for my work. Helpful feedback. It's something I think you should consider because you have talent :-)
i also like how you use mix opposites into sentences. and for some reason the line "individuality through deformity" really made sence to me. i guess because it makes it seem like deformity is a gift in some sence, because you have it coupled with individuality which is i think, something every human longs for, to different, to be unique, to stand out, etc. in a sense it feels like, when you put it that way, ugly and deformed people are still blessed in their individuality. i don't know if that's what you were trying to say, but that's i think why it sounds beautiful to me. because if you can make deformity sounds appealing in any sense, that's talent. lol. --michelle.
its beautiful especially the last line thats cool