kick me
beat me
shove me in the mud
the sun burns
a red halo
around your head
notice something
small and maybe
semmingly insignificant
i'm still smiling
becuase in the end
i win.

you can break my heart
in more pieces than two
you can gossip and badmouth
laugh, if you really want to
i'll walk by
head held high
i refuse.
i will balk, 
i will not let you
make me cry.

you are worthless
and i should feel no shame
so you thought 
that love was just a game.
well that's nice
you played me well
fuck you too
rot in hell.

intentions good
or even bad
i dont care
to hear the reasons that you had.
dont tell me
becuase you think
it hurts
well, guess what boy
you're a jerk.

i remeber once
you made me hurt so much
i just wanted to give up
curl up
and die.
but then i left that place
and regained
my lost grace
and i will make it 
in this world
even if I have to do it alone.

sorry you cant be here
it's a shame really
that you won't get the chance
to bask in my fame.
so push me in the mud
and kick rocks in my face
i'm not the one
who lost his place.

you lost your
"easy lay"
you lost your friend
becuase im sorry
but emotions aren't a game
i want to play.

i win becuase
im not playing the game
i'll win becuase
i wont feel any shame.
i'll move on
and you'll be gone.
just a faint memory of something
that maybe once
"used to be".

i never said
it was easy.
but i refuse to frown.
you didnt hurt me
just let me down.
so here i go again
becuase courage
isn't always the loudest voice
courage is the meek
waking up and saying
today... i will try again.
today, i will find a friend
today... is finially
the beginning
of the end.

xxoox
ELlie J