Crappy Crap

whatever words i say will never be good enough and i dont know why it is i have to feel this way trust me i hate it i hate it and i hate you. everyday you make my life hell everyday you do something that makes me laugh aswell and i get swept under the tide again and im lost in your eyes and i wonder why the fuck it has to be this way. i dont want this anymore. i dont want you anymore. and i cant believe those words anymore.. not that i ever could. crap. crap. im not mad at james... i am jsjut. stressed and angry with myself. why the fuck arent i over him??? xoxo Ellie