the sinking feeling
that fear only feeds the pain
its just a matter of time
before mistakes are made
before love happens again.

its just a delusion
a lie to get inside
to bore through the soft flesh
of another one's heart.

the termites that terminate
they degenerate, disintergrate
left alone and cold
the bleeding feeling of pain
of a longing not untold.

and yet waiting for the day
when the buttlerfly wings unfold.
when all the sunshine falls 
upon the body
when all the happiness
devours the mind.

all the good comes from one smile
all the time could never be the while.
its just not fair
that longing always turns into despair.

tragedy is not without tomorrow
the smile is not without sorrow.
it's just another day spent
just another one night event...

love is a delusion
and maybe we all long to be
delirious... devoted, enveloped.

its with sinking fear
that pain is longing
for that certain feeling
of utter despair.

xoxo
Ellie J