Self-absorbed Truths

That night, I picked up the phone and dialed his number I missed him terribly I wanted to talk to him I needed to hear his voice say, “You’re beautiful.” I think I love him I wanted to tell him all of this I picked up the phone and dialed his number With purpose I would tell him how much he meant to me I would tell him everything The conversation was light and flirtatious I didn’t want to spoil the mood So I held my tongue And as we said “Goodbye” I wanted to scream, “Wait! I love you!” But I didn’t As I haven’t done before As I know I must do. I keep telling myself that there’ll be a time, a place for us to be together For me to pour my soul out to him If now is not the time When will it come? And will I recognize it when it gets here Or let it fall out of my grasp again? I want to live in the moment Instead I’m living in dreams And worrying about the “What if”s that the future holds