How You Wanted Me

Got my music blaring through my headphones It makes me forget that I'm all alone I have this theory But it's only possible if you make it to be That if it's loud enough I can't hear my thoughts anymore So in the music I will soar My thoughts, They only hold me back They turn my world cold and black In the music I break free From all my pain and misery Get caught up in what's being said And not what's going on in my head Talk to me and I will scream at you Because I can't hear anything you say or do I am a total mess I think before the play button I press That is my last thought as I start to drift away To some parrallel universe where I will stay Until back into reality I snap With just one tap From the one thing I was running away from Now I'm left feeling numb My thoughts are back in my head Along with the memories floating dead Why? Why? Why? I question But the answer is not mentioned Does IT like seeing me in pain Watching my bright skys start to rain This thing I fight Is no where in sight Because it is found within my soul The very thing that's been stole It's the part of me I hide Of me you only see one side That happy girl is down the drain The wreck that I am runs through my veins IT said it didn't like me for who I was But what if I don't like what IT does Yet IT controls me && Who I want to be Now are YOU happy Now that I'm hiding from my thoughts and reality Is this how YOU wanted me This total wreck that you see Yeah, that's what I thought All my imperfections you fought But weren't they better than what I've become Feeling lonely and numb Leave and NEVER look back So in the back of my mind, my memories I will stack Headphones go back on Escaping from reality...&& Now I'm gone Good-Bye to you and your pittyless self I put my conscience on the shelf Of all my past mistakes Life is only what I make Make it good or bad Happy or sad It's all just the same Full of approval and shame But for me I escape reality If only for a moment It's my final atempt To be who I want to be Without worrying what anyone sees Is this how YOU wanted me Blaring music escaping reality My thoughts and memories That are now my mistakes of the past OH, Why won't this music last Go on and on and on Everyone look, All of her thoughts are gone