How do I describe the feeling of hopelessness when my life
can be so much worse?

I can't say that I'm completely lost

I've seen dejection and a feeling of being worthless at its
worst 

So how then do I describe how I'm feeling at this moment?

I feel like theres a huge weight just sitting on my
shoulders. Beating down on me until I finally cave in.

But I can't

There's too much responsiblity, too many people who need me
okay and happy.

I want to be sad, but I feel guilty. I feel guilty because I
know I have a good life

I have what some kids can only dream of

And yet I'm sad

Old friends dying, friendships lost, babies gone, more
responsiblity then ever.

The stress is breaking me down. The feelings are breaking me
down.

I just need one day

One day
Where I can get rid of everything

Every feeling of anything but happy for the day

I'm hoping Monday will bring me that

But 

Life only seems to kick harder when you're down.