I hung myself with my best friends belt (NP)

I hung myself with my best friends belt I remember our last summer. Love is so confusing, and I’ll never forget what we did to each other. It was the summer I hung myself with my best friends belt. I tried so hard to stay, but you know I couldn’t help but wander. My heart didn’t belong to you and yet you still wanted to claim me as your own. We had our fun and then you went away, so far away away away... She was beautiful, a rare exotic form. Unlike anything you’d seen before! I knew right then we were done, she had taken you from my arms. I wish I’d known then what I know now, the cliché stings me like a dulling blade. I know we could have made it work. I just wish that she didn’t make this worse! I know you want her, but she forbidden. Her heart is missing, or only hidden? She left you wide open to the disease and you inhaled her like a powder drug. I realize now, you maybe could have made it, but you’ll never see her smile. She wasn’t happy with you, but is she happy now? After you pull yourself out from under the dark skies will you finally see what happened? Or what could have been, it was so much more! I lay awake at night, seeing you only when close my eyes! I wish we still had the smallest bit of what we once were. I can only dream! Still I’ll hold on to, hold on to, hold on to you! As I walk along this lonely path that lay before me, I look back and see my body. On the path we’ve taken, you only used me. Treated me like some guilty pleasure china doll, only to be used when we’re alone, never in reality! So if you want me, you’ll come back. Come back to me when you heads back in order. But know by then, we’ll so be over! Don’t you dare take me for granted again, for I was so blind! Go ahead, try to, go on with me! You can’t live on sex alone, you need love too. Why did you leave me alone?! I was right there, ready for you. You had me, complete and all! You were what I needed, what do I have to live on now?! Forever lost without your guidance, I’m so alone! I have finish bleeding for you, you hated that anyway. I’d scream this to you but her hands cover your ears. Now your deaf to, my screams of sorrow! How can you sleep at night, and not think about what you’re losing? Now that we’ve come back to a little of what we had, what will happen next? I don’t wanna know! Just let me go! I’ll run away, but as I try to cut you away, you steal my blade. Don’t you dare try and keep me, now I’m gone! So far away now, where have run to?! Lost in my chaos forest, sometimes I call it my head. But right now, my head is floating, a friend called Jack took me to a better place. I swim above this, and see the black waters below. I try to steer my heart-shaped boat, only to fall into a storm of you! I’ll always love you, and as I search for a replacement to what I’ve lost, I’ll never find another you! This has gone on for way too long, but I don’t want this to stop. If we stop, so does my heart. I will not die for you again! I don’t want you, even while you come crawling back. I holler at you at the top of my voice! But it’s all in my head, and I know if I stay too long, one of us will wind up dead. So I’ll wait till you’ll hear me, I just stop talking. But you never notice, all I do for you! And I know you don’t know anything about what this means, what you meant and still do, you still do, you still...... do.... NP means narrative poem so its a bit long.