Come take a ride on the What-If Bus
sit by the window and don't miss the view.
We're going to places--fantastical places
imagined by only unfortunate few.

What if the pumpkin bread
I made and gave to family and friends
was baked in loaf pans greased with RAID
rather than non-stick PAM?

What if the burners are lit on the stove
(although I've checked each one four times)?
So I drive back home
the garage door is down--CHECK
the front door is locked--CHECK
the toaster unplugged--CHECK
and touch each knob while the voice in my head
like a constant alarm bell chimes--
OFF OFF OFF OFF

Come take a ride on the What-If bus.
What if the house burns down?
or gas fills up the house
and in carbon monoxide my babies drown?
What if then I lose my mind
and curl up like a fetus, forget all I knew?
Yeah, come take a ride on the What-If bus.
What's the matter--
you don't like the view?

Come take a ride on the What-If bus.
What if I say the wrong thing?
What if I call my boss a bitch
or my husband another man's name?
What if instead of Merry Christmas
I write in my cards things I never should tell?
What if I take off my clothes in church
and run through the aisles 
screaming "Shit! Damn! Hell!"

Come take a ride on the What-If bus.
All the passengers get to drive.
And we're all so tired
we'd sleep at the wheel
if only we could close our eyes....
if only for a moment
we could close our eyes.

by Lisa Rodriguez
1998