An Undecided Lie

I don't know what to believe. This or that. Everything can decieve. I don't want to trust the positive. But the negative I fear is the truth. Good turns out bad. It's basicly a lie. I get so excited. When I found out, I start to cry. There is no other way to look at this. I hate myself more and more every day. Confidence lasts a day, Then I find out the good was just a lie.