Sometimes I run and hide...

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By Skin~Essays •

Sometimes I wish I could explain why it is I am in so much pain The pain it hurts and keeps my heart on high alert I dont understand sometimes why i feel this way and it seems to just hit me at all times of the day One minute I can be just fine and the next feel like I just lost my mind It tears me up inside I want to run and hide I scream screams no one can hear sometimes I think they are after me I fear I run and run till I fall and hit the ground I scream but there is no sound I wish I could exscape all this pain and learn to keep my mind tame I know I write to express how I feel sometimes I just dont know what's real I've learned to hide whats really inside almost to the point I think I have died I lie and say I am fine when in truth I think I'm going out of my mind I freaking hurt this is the truth look at my arms they'll show you proof I'm all cut up and not just on the outside But some people have killed me inside I need to run I need to hide I'm sorry that I only know how to lie and say I'm just FINE when really truthfully I can't control my mind I need help but don't know where to turn trust is something I did not learn I just dont know what to do How do I trust and tell you whats going on in my life before I use this knife

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January 19, 2008 05:17Sheila

You just keep writing. Writing is the souls way of sighing when it needs to. I understand writing. Can't and won't lie about cutting I don't understand that. I am ,I'm sure older than you.I do know this, when we hurt we know we're alive. so you be sure to keep writing. As far as the insanity part in your user info. I have a belief and I'm not afraid to share it. I believe we're all a little crazy. Thats what makes us all different and unique.

January 19, 2008 05:24Sheila

Be sure to visit me and my writing. I may not write about things that interest you very much,but then what I write about just might touch something in you. Thats tearing at you on the inside needing you to acknowledge it. If you'll read my user info, it'll help you to understand how I have come to be where I am. Once you've knelt beside your children broken and held them broken,bleeding in your arms.And told they may not live everything changes..................won't you visit me and my poems?

January 21, 2008 17:06Sheila

I just read what you wrote on my page of Seekers Beware. Lord, knows I understand the hurt,pain and confusion.You are going through I am so sorry about all that is piling up on you. God, has always been faithful to me. Even when I wasn't to him and when I couldn't find or feel him anywhere. I'll pray for you and your son. Just have faith,trust in God. Sometimes thats all we have in this life. No matter what tomorrow may bring trust in God.That he will bring you through it. I would love to hear more from you but I am skiddish of posting my email address on here.

February 26, 2008 05:11a rose by any otha name

life can be so cruel to one's life, i feel your pain through the words u write

January 25, 2009 17:20 ~~~~GLOSTARG~~~~

your poem is so touching and it is sad that you have not learned to trust anyone, it seems we live in an untrustworthy world these days...
an old saying "to thine own self be true comes to mind..just be truthful to your own self, and i believe that little "light" will illuminate the way for you to be able to trust again. It will strengthen you to be able to pray, talk to One, who will be trust worthy.
Keep on writing your poems, writing is a beautiful release and a healing within it's own. Your deep fears and pain will not take over your life , if you just keep on keeping on...writing!
God Bless you and keep you safe and may he always light your way in this life and the next. Glo

August 3, 2009 02:54xSecretWriterx

cool