Jonathan

Sometimes when I can't find myself I turn to you You often sit in silence and I feel asthough I bleed upon the floor And you just sit there Like all the times before. I change the channel but the show is all the same distorted, without sound... I try to make the picture clear But the fuzzy reception Is of your fault my dear. I scream as loud As I possibly can. You stare at me in wonder Do you even care? I cry alone at night Wishing you were there. Sometimes I wonder What it would be like That is... my life, to have never seen your face... I feel empty at the thought As I do not know my place. I feel as though you are the solid ground. And I am free enough safe enough, to run. But you don't want me.. And you are my only one. When you shook me from the perception that I had I bagan to depisre you You make me so sad. I promised that nobody Would ever have my heart For If they do not have it They cannot tear it apart. You decieved me, And warmed me through and through I thought I found something different Something good with you. Now every night Is the darkest I am always afraid... And you just sit there you get angry when I ask, But do you even care? Dear Jonathan. You will never understand Exactly what I meant when I said that I love you. It's a shame too really, cuz I really really do. xox-Ellie