Moving On

For four years I loved you For four years I suffered I died inside watching you In your obliviousness Where were you when I cried myself to sleep? You were dreaming sweet dreams Probably of Her What were you thinking When you hugged me? I never wanted it to end Thinking, just keep holding me And when I was drowning in my poisoned thoughts you went off to one place or another You could make me bubbly inside Like a bottle of wine Just make me want to blow Understand? You can make me so happy. Then there are those times When you don’t laugh with me Or even speak You can make me feel so ugly Like a withered flower That just lost all its Confidence and beauty Do you get it? You own me And you don’t even know Everything you do All the things you say They just float around inside me With no place to go Nobody to talk to I bear this burden alone Just me and my keyboard I’ll never forget what you’ve done You taught me the meaning Of pain It was you who changed me forever I’ll never forget But I will move on I’ll stop trying to figure out Who you’re checking Or if she deserves you And I’ll stop telling myself That I’m not worthy of you I’ll stop putting myself down Stop telling myself I’m stupid And ugly But most of all I will never Again Believe I hate you Or say, “I Love you” Not even in my head Until I first hear it from your mouth I’m moving on I’m leaving pain behind And for the first time In a long time I will be truly happy.