"I loved you" I said. "Forever" I prayed I would hear you say

I have a thought You put it into my head The thought of a knife. Slashing my wrists. Taking a little more of my life each time. I told you it felt like my only escape. When I told you how I felt. You pulled me close saying 'shh' and asking yourself what u did. I wanted to pull away knowing it was just going to be another night. I just stayed in your arms, praying both that you would let me go, and that you would hold me forever It felt so right yet so wrong. This isn't right. I was so close to being over you, you kissed me that way again. You took my power to talk Your tingling kiss made me powerless and defencless against you. You killed me, you took my will to live. you made me cry, you broke me down, you made me think I wasnt good enough. You made me wait for months to find out that you loved someone more. But I realized that I am done with nights on the floor. And passing nights with memories. And everyday that I am by myself. I see a knife and cant help but atleast to pick it up then having to fight the erge to drive it into my stomach and let myself bleed. With the dying words, "I loved you, Why didnt you love me? Was I not good enough? y did u hold me like that?" but my very last sentence to you I hope you be "I love you baby, I never stopped I hope you love me too." and I pray that u would say, "I love you baby, forever."