Closed In

By Francesca Gordiani •
Emotions hide inside.
Deep.
So deep there's only one
way to let them free, really.
Maybe more than one.
The more sensible one would be
pen to paper, i suppose.
Not enough i fear though.
My mind rushes
along with adrenaline in my veins.
I pick it up.
My partner in crime.
Run the tip of it
across my skin.
Collect my thoughts and
tease myself with the knife.
Sometimes i want to cut
deep.
So deep that it reaches my
hidden thoughts and emotions.
I beg for the
blood to trickle down my skin already.
But the knife isn't deep enough yet.
Now? Can i saddisfy my needs now?
I suppose it would be alright.
Yes. Now's perfect.
A straight line.
On the lower left side of my stomach.
God, this feels great.
Close to dead inside till this moment.
So liberating.
I need to come back to reality.
I hate these stupid
fucking
feelings that won't let me be.
No clue really how to rid them.
This is the only way i really
know how to.
Everything else won't work for me.
Even 5 minutes of peace will do.
That's about 5 minutes more of happiness.