I feel my head pound,
As I try to refrain from listening to the sound.
It's the abyss and escape- the numbing feeling from the hurt
and the pain that keeps bringing me here,
Pushes everything out and I have nothing to fear.
I feel some peace, It's a quick release.
The thoughts roll around and around in my head, 
It makes me hard to read and my thoughts are still left
unsaid.
That's why I write to let it out,
Try to scream and shout.
Turning my feelings into paper and pen,
I don't always feel I get out all out- not diffusing the
hurt and the pain then.
I wish I could at least think straight,
Guess in time things will become clear but until then I'll
just wait.
I'm setting myself up for a new start,
Distancing myself from the past.
I know the past will always be a part of me,
But without closing that chapter I cannot truly see.
Through the haze, the confusion- the past,
I know it will not happen over night and I know it will not
happen fast.
But I know it will happen for me,
And I know I'll become who I want to be.
I spend my life protecting others but forgetting me,
And I know no-one would disagree.
I am too self less and perhaps that is my downfall,
I tend to crumble at the sign of conflict and begin to
crawl.
But this is the part where I realise and begin to grow.
I have realised my faults and I will let them go.