I have hidden things all my life, To help people stay out of strife. All the anger i forced away, Now i just want them to pay. Parents, friends and family, I wish i could make them see -see what i have inside, But it's something ill always hide. Secrets that ive kept locked away, And i guess thats how they have stayed. The secrets i thought i had put away, Somehow just like to stay. I cant tell anyone the things from my past, Cause the support usually doesnt last. The pain lives in me, Making my body ache cause they run free. But i had just fooled myself, Acting like i had it all together within oneself. Sometimes it hurts so bad, But in a way it actually makes me glad. It makes me realise things about myself that i have never seen, new depths arise takes me to parts of me i have never been. Hatred still somehow controls my life, Wanting me to reach for that knife. the thought is so strong, And it doesnt even seem wrong. It's what i wanna do, Get released from the hurt and pain i've been through. Seems their is just no other way, I dont even feel like taking grip of each and everyday. But before i do i just want 'them' to see, the pain that they caused me. These burdens i have carried all my life, And im so sick of the strife. I just wanna see them pay, For all the times they made me pretend everything was okay. It hard when i do care, But right now it's just to much to bare. Dealing with everything in one hit, Just overwhelmes me i can do nothing but just sit. I know what some people see, It's not the real me. All they'd do is judge, There opinions usually wont budge. Making me known as this person im not, Tidal waving-making everyones opinions of me not that crash hot. Its as if im evil, "Dont let anyone near me im like a weavil. I'll polute you all, Please kick me if i crawl. Crawl up to you for pitty, Trust me im smart and whitty. Im a wolf dressed up as a sheep, I can make you weap." STOP!!!!!!!!! It is not me, I just wanted you to see. Im the person i was born, Not this person you have torn. Why do u think this way of me? Does it make you jump with glee? To see someones life about to drown, Well you deserve a fucking crown. Growing this hatred inside, And now its open and wide. I want you to destroy your own life, Stop you from causing this strife. That will be the way i make you pay, Ill watch as you weaken n crumble that day. But i guess thats not me- im not that way, Your 'perfectly polluting'life it'll prob stay. I love you, Even with everything you have put me through. It's just everything is popping out, Making me uncontrollably shout. So i will shout.