sitting here thinking of you

im sitting here thinking of you trying to get rid of the memories i just dont know what to do you made my life a miserable hell everytime you hit me and everytime i fell when tomorrow comes and im not in your arms ill be wondering what happended am i still your lucky charms? i hate the part that you hate me im wondering on the inside could this really be? why would i wanna spend the rest of my life being beated on and abused maybe not and ill end it with this knife but what would it do to my family and friends it would put them in pain could this be it? where my life ends?? going back to you would be the worst mistake i know im not gonna do it because all you are is a fake you said that you could change but i dont think so this all feels very strange once you've did that youll think ill change my mind im not that stupid somebody better than you thats not hard to find yes, ill miss all those cuddles and kisses but thats not the point thats not my wishes my wish is to find someone out there not like you someone that loves me and that will care but im still here thinking of you trying to get rid of all those memories i still dont know what to do.