If I Only Had A Beat

broke out 100 times, snorted near 1000 lines until finally i just broke away for good one night. people always said id never amount to anything and now here i am and ive amounted to everything. count your blessings and thank false advertisements, and the media for sending your kids messages through christ and violence. i ran to the church across the street and busted through the door, got to the altar, and the priest was who i stood before. he crossed me in blood, said say 10 "Hail Mary's", 5 "Our Father's", but that didnt work apparently, coz im still standing here, repenting for my sins, only to turn around and have my house broken in, like karma didnt have enough to do with me before, so now she's gotta come back and torture me some more. one day ill fix this twisted life that i have led, until then i'll just keep wishing that im dead. its always one thing and if you say its nothing, then its something. and if it isnt something, then its everything in between. if you swear up and down that i dont know what you mean, try me, and take a look at what the fuck ive seen: sexual standards of beauty to your girls in magazines, persuasion that war is right, to sending your boys over-seas. switching back and forth from topic to topic, the government still doesnt know what to say to the public, because a crippled young man who had lost all his brothers was forced to invade a hostile country to protect his mother. when it comes down to figuring out whats wrong from right, one bad judgment could affect the rest of your life. I died one time and God wasn't there. I walked through the valley of the shadows without a care, demons all around me, an angel whispered in my ear, said "Son, You and I both know you belong here." and if it wasnt for that angel, i'd be in hell, i'd have wandered 100,000 miles to the gates of hell. I'll leave the outcasts to think of me what they will, in the mean time, ill go crawl back inside my shell.