I hate this
I dont want to love him anymore
I cry
I scream
I feel every ounce of ache in my chest
all the time spent together
every second
every kiss
every touch

I hate this
the tears wont stop
the hole wont heal
the pain lingers

I hate this
I want it to go 
i want it to stop 
i dont want to love him anymore

why cant i stop loving him?
why cant this pain cease?
why can i not get him out of my head
thinking about him
dreaming about him
wondering what he is doing
wondering if shes better than me
wondering if he loves her more than he did me

I hate this.