does she understand you like i did?
does she tell you everything like i did?

does she reach into the dark recesses of her soul
share the demons locked in there
like i never could

does she share her odd sense of humor with you?
when you're sad does she listen to you
does she sit with you and let you tell her everything
without judging
like i could?

does she tell you how much you mean to her?
every second of the day

do you call her a crazy bitch too?
a psycho?
a nutcase?

on her birthday?

do you care about her?
like you never cared about me

did you care that i cried after i sent those messages?
did i tell you that those tears were filled with 
hate for myself and not you?
rage that i could never be what you want
no matter how hard i try
i could never be who you want

did you care that when i saw you on the dart
my heart dropped to my knees
i held onto the cold metal pole
because i almost collapsed
did i tell you i never touch those poles?

did i tell you my feet were glued to the floor
and when it finally registered
i ran 
i felt like my heart was being ripped in half
torn and scrambled around the floor
being walked all over
by the oblivious train passengers

did i tell you my stomach was still going insane with
sadness for an hour afterward?
did i tell you that i would do anything for you to come back
 to me?
did i tell you that i know you deserve better then me?

did i tell you i knew it would never work out?
did i tell you that i knew you never really cared?
 
because if you did you would never let me go for something
silly like that

did i tell you that i know it will never be the same way
ever again?

but i do hope for the best for you and her,
hopefully she has the something that you need
and that i didnt have.