Tears

MY heart is aching, yet is not breaking. It is whole with a small hole getting bigger and bigger. Saying good bye to some one you love. you seem to feel like your soul is going to break. Try, try again.. nothing, nothing gets better. Hanging by a thread. loosing what grip and control that is there. Wanting to blow off steam that really can not be blown. Tears so many Tears the eyes red and puffy. Starts to Fill sick in the stomach, head is pounding, thoughts roaming around and around in the head. Tears streaming down the face on their own and than you feel the wetness from them. crying yourself to sleep, crying in your sleep, can't sleep. Telling the mind its free and at the same time it seems so unreal and cramped inside with thoughts. Thoughts of what did I do wrong? Why couldn't it work? Why put so much effort from both sides, if it is not going to even work? Why couldn't we come to an even line of understanding? Good byes really are sad parts of life.