Her breath stank of gin and tonic.
I was disgusted. 
I knew where she had been. 
She was at the bar again.
I bet the men were pawing her like always.
She never tells them no. As long as they buy her a drink she
is happy to let them feel her up, front and back.
I hate it when she comes home looking to get the quick fix
from me. 
I know its not me she sees when she closes her eyes.
It’s the other men. 
They all love her.
No, they love her body.
I hate that she loves their attention. 
Why can’t I be enough for her?
Why can’t she just dance with her girlfriends and ignore
those other men?
	I thought marriage would be fun with her.
I thought her days of partying and being the center of
attention was over.
I thought I was that stable force she said she needed in her
life.
I guess I am guilty too.
I let her leave. 
I know where she goes. 
I know it’s not to her friends house. 
	What can I do? 
Lay down the law and loose her. 
I don’t want to take anything away from her. 
I want her to have fun.
I just want it to be fun with me. 
I know she isn’t cheating on me.
She wouldn’t want sex with me so much after these little
excursions. 
I wish I could get into that head of hers and find out what
it is she gets from these men. 
I want to give her everything.
I want to make her happy.