paranoia,
its like a phobia.
you have to run,
or else ur life is done.

people will be looking,
they are all watching.
then u must run and hide,
its some sort of a sick deadly ride.

i am not proud of what i feel,
because i end up running in circles on and endless wheel.
but you think we're crazy,
but this is no fun as you should see.

i cant take a rest,
its all a huge test.
for me its survival,
for you it doesn't make sense at all.

i must check every corner,
and act like a f*cker.
if people ever whisper,
i know its about me, the "her."

because i don't matter,
its not a grand flatter.
my heart beats too fast,
because i keep living in the past.

i may look fine to you,
and then i see "you know who."
and suddenly my heart pound like h*ll,
i cant breathe and you could tell.

my hands will shake,
the room is spinning and i ache.
then you look over at me,
innocently...

and suddenly i want to die,
because i cannot deny.
on what I'd know you'd do to me,
even though I'm already free.

i felt the blood trickle down my arm,
i felt someone stab me, giving me an alarm.
i then start to scream,
but when i looked, there was nothing there as it seemed.

because i seemed tense,
i seemed to have lost all of my friends.
even though i still have some,
it is very hard to keep them all at once.

and i beg and lie that i was joking,
but they dont believe me and i end up up crying and
soaking.
if only you had felt the impulse i had,
because when u think about it, it all seems quite sad.

especially since people expect me to soon find a
"doctor..."
yet i end up being the runner and the blocker...

just let me tell you this,
because you better not tell the rest.
because this is our little secret,
and now i've let you into my world, my little pet...