But if you knew

You smile at me And I smile back But if you knew How dead I was inside You'd buy me a casket And tell me you'll miss me You laugh at things So I follow you But if you knew How sad I was inside You'd empty an ocean And tell me to fill it again With my own tears You seem so care-free And I try to be like you But if you knew How filled with dread I am every day and night You'd tell me to drown in it So I would worry mo more You only see half of me The side I want you to see But it's that other half That will slowly die with me.