How Can You Say

How can you say that I don't know your level of pain? How do you know what I go through everyday of my life? Each day I wake up and know that what I have is not what I want. That without consequences I would've ended it months ago. That I am easily the reason that decides life or death. I go, she goes. I stay, she stays. I stay withheld and dormant. Every dawn, every dusk, my mind races with thoughts that I fucked up along the way. That my chance was way back then and then it stays. That no matter how bad I want or need this, it will never be. I can pray my fucking heart out, but nothing will happen. Knowing that each day my body sinks. Knowing that I'm stuck in the muck that is my relationship. Knowing that no matter what I will never get to go home to my dream girl. That I can't have the same little girl with anyone else. That that name will only stick with this one. I pray that someday, somehow, I will be freed of my committed solitude. That hope, though, dies each day. I hurt, and this hurt carries because my dream girl roams. All I want is to be yours, for you to be mine. To care for you and wipe the tears away. Take you places everyday. I will never know the same pleasure than I could have had with you. How can you say that I don't know your pain? It may not be the same, but I know it all too well. This fear out of pity, and scrutiny ravages my inner being. So I say again, how can you say that I don't know your pain? We may be far different, but not far gone.