Color Myself Red

I sit alone in my empty room Welcoming the darkness that surrounds me Letting it take over me Scared of what's to come Scared of what I'll never know Knowing that I did whats right But dreading every second of my new existence Dreading that frightful night When I finally decide that I'm done with the pain and sorrow that now surrounds me with the darkness that used to comfort me Waiting for something to happen Some creek Some voice Something To get me to think of something else Besides the knife on the table But nothing comes Im left in the darkness of what I used to be To think of no better option Than to color myself red With the knife my history