June 19 2005

the small pointy blade
held to my skin once more
what i thought had finally stopped
had come knocking back on my door
and life seems like it was before

the small rush i got
upon re-stumbling on my old high
my old way of life catching up on me
as i hold my wrist tonight and just lie
life is as it was then, but didnt i try?

try to make a new start
to stop the pain inside
to no longer be that girl with the need to cut
the one who had no need to hide
to curl up within her lonely soul n wish to have died

i thought i was no longer her
that i had finally gone past that part
i guess i was wrong
cause im here with my old blade, back at the start
and each cut i make, is one to my heart.