lost

I dont know what to do. Hello, mom. Hello, dad. I love you, always. I wish I didn't hide my feelings from you. Maybe I'd be more comfortable in my skin. I try to find myself in men but I need to find myself in me. I keep holding on to this idea that my value depends on the presence of a man and I think it's because I could never get my dad to stay. Why did he leave so much? I begged and begged but he still walked away. I'm not worthy of that love.