Swollen

burn marks are never fun but then again it's just begun how can one act be repeated without any gain? oh lord. how i love the stinging pain the flush of red on white what a stupid thing I have done tonight. trash my soul to the rythem of Alexisonfire cry now, die now sighs of sorrow and yet continue this well worn path of self destruction and what? without reason you might not understand but in my heart this is whats right. die a little more tonight. and the things i hide my disorders i live when night falls and the worls crumbles and all is bleak i wake up morning time happy and ready to go again "the lies of friends you didnt have" what a line popped into my head. don't cover the right wings, wings carry me away in a sky of red the calling calls now pill popping all night madness blurry lights and truths pour my soul on my carpet let the stains remain for eternity can't you see who i am? i unleash myself upon the world yet hide it, times sevenfold. paint my soul black paint my walls my life my mind my heart of stone stonebreakers. light a fire in my soul and let it burn right through until im ashes again and the fun has just begun. let me bleed let me cry let me swallow and let my fly high let me be me... dont be afraid im normal i swear. i swear by these scars these marks secrets out now. and you dont want me and you dont like me but love holds us here in limbo. come what may i will always cry. i will always hurt never knowing happiness without a source what the fuck. and these flame marks so pretty. these patterns they make me giddy and as they blister and peel soon i know they'll heal and then bandaids gone burning into my soul another song. dont cry for me dont try for me im already lost. but im happiest here in teh dark in teh dead i belong with the forgotten. gravestones mark me your smile haunts me and when im ready i'll peel back my sleeves and show you all. i'll lay with you and hope you lvoe me still i'll hold you close and whisper sweet nothings secrets and all i know. all i hide i promise to let it show. but only if you ask. if you only want to know are we freinds like that? tonight, as i cry in my sleep calling out your name these marks burning remind me of my bad. all i want is reason all i wanted was you but him too... hold on, i'll be better. i will behave myself i promise in my love you i gave turn away from my tears fast forward the years. things i want to tell them all why am i afraid i'll fall? why. another mark, a mission, a scar and im ready now to tell you who you are? no. no. never. not. im really sure i've already forgot. intoxicate me with those haunting eyes. please. cant i forget about you and let us be as we are. try and keep us this way. until another day. i dont trust myself do you? would you if you only knew... do you mind? i do. and i sing to the mirror brushing out hair ripping more. bleed fake blood does anyone even care? xoxo kyelle