The "New Girl" (Part III).

none of it worked until just recently. even though you hate it, please just try to cope with me, because i don't know that i could stop.. but i do know i don't want to right now. it's a lot to take it, but i'm not giving in, i'm not giving up. i can't care anymore if you think i'm fucking up. please just wish me good luck, because i've just felt so far gone and hopeless for so long. getting closer to what *you* wanted didn't feel right, and no matter how hard i try it never works. just hold my hand as i walk away from the hurt. as i get farther away.. i know i won't know all the right words to say. but i love you, i'll always love you, even though i don't expect it back. if you must shut the door, atleast leave a crack. i don't want to push you all away. i want so much for you to stay.. but i WILL NOT CHANGE FOR YOU OR ANYONE. i'm sick and tired to death of holding back from things i want for everyone. i just want you to see this is how i feel good. i just want you to his see this is how i am "me". i just want you to see that this how i am happy. love michelle.