Mental Torture

Yet again, i'm thinking about you tonight waiting for you call waiting for you to say you love me but where are you? out there having a life, not bothering about me you think it's all one big joke to leave me here in the gutter crying my heart out i guess your really not bothered it's torture, that's what it is do you understand that? why don't you just answer my calls? why make me beg you and need you? do you enjoy seeing me like this? one day i want to have a life too i can't understand why you hurt me so much all i ever did was love you but you never understood and when i cried you didn't even comfort me you just walked away how insensitive can you be? i don't know how you live with yourself you hurt me so much i wish i could just turn my feelings off for you like you have because you never really loved me in the first place admit it, you didn't you should have dumped me a long time ago to save me from all this hurt it's torture you just decided to string me along does it make you happy to see me crying? does it make you laugh to see me beg? i couldn't help falling in love with you and i thought you was perfect until i saw you for your true self and now i'm sat here, all alone, crying and crying but do you care? you have just wiped me out of your life like i didn't exist and i need you even though you treated me bad, i still love you it's torture it's so unfair, why didn't you tell me it was over? instead of stringing me along for months with your mind games, tricks and lies i'll find someone better than you one day someone who does actually care and will not torture me how did you just forget me like that? do you never think about me and the times we had? or am i not important to you anymore? have you found someone else? i don't even get a phone call from you i've had no explanation and even though it's been ages there's not a day goes by when i don't think about you and it's torture you'll never know what you put me through and i don't think you'll ever try to understand because you simply don't care how coldhearted can you be? i've seen a different side to you now and i pity the next girl that gets with you she'll be put through mental torture like i was one day, you'll see me with someone else and you'll realise what you've lost but it will be too late and you'll know what it's like to need somebody i hope one day, i can finally move on because it's the same thing day after day waiting for your call, watching through the window while you carry on like nothings ever happened and you continue to torture me, why? it needs to end, i feel worthless and stupid you made me feel like this all this pain, anger and frustration i just want you here, with me people tell me i'm crazy for wanting you you don't seem to care one day, i will forget you and i'll meet someone better than you and then this torture can end..... for Ben Copyright Rebecca Waring