Yet again, i'm thinking about you tonight
waiting for you call
waiting for you to say you love me
but where are you?
out there having a life, not bothering about me
you think it's all one big joke
to leave me here in the gutter crying my heart out
i guess your really not bothered
it's torture, that's what it is
do you understand that?
why don't you just answer my calls?
why make me beg you and need you?
do you enjoy seeing me like this?
one day i want to have a life too
i can't understand why you hurt me so much
all i ever did was love you
but you never understood
and when i cried you didn't even comfort me
you just walked away
how insensitive can you be?
i don't know how you live with yourself
you hurt me so much
i wish i could just turn my feelings off for you
like you have
because you never really loved me in the first place
admit it, you didn't
you should have dumped me a long time ago
to save me from all this hurt
it's torture
you just decided to string me along
does it make you happy to see me crying?
does it make you laugh to see me beg?
i couldn't help falling in love with you
and i thought you was perfect
until i saw you for your true self
and now i'm sat here, all alone, crying and crying
but do you care?
you have just wiped me out of your life like i didn't exist
and i need you
even though you treated me bad, i still love you
it's torture
it's so unfair, why didn't you tell me it was over?
instead of stringing me along for months
with your mind games, tricks and lies
i'll find someone better than you one day
someone who does actually care
and will not torture me
how did you just forget me like that?
do you never think about me and the times we had?
or am i not important to you anymore?
have you found someone else?
i don't even get a phone call from you
i've had no explanation
and even though it's been ages
there's not a day goes by when i don't think about you
and it's torture
you'll never know what you put me through
and i don't think you'll ever try to understand
because you simply don't care
how coldhearted can you be?
i've seen a different side to you now
and i pity the next girl that gets with you
she'll be put through mental torture
like i was
one day, you'll see me with someone else
and you'll realise what you've lost
but it will be too late
and you'll know what it's like to need somebody
i hope one day, i can finally move on
because it's the same thing day after day
waiting for your call, watching through the window
while you carry on like nothings ever happened
and you continue to torture me, why?
it needs to end, i feel worthless and stupid
you made me feel like this
all this pain, anger and frustration
i just want you here, with me
people tell me i'm crazy for wanting you
you don't seem to care

one day, i will forget you and i'll meet someone better than
you

and then this torture can end.....


for Ben


Copyright Rebecca Waring