beaten down
frozen i drown.. inside
open up your eyes
open them up wide.
understand the pain;
my heart's suicide.

do you mind that much?
do you think i really care?
this time it's really not
better to share.
confined by the penalties
of tomorrow.
they mask all memories of
now forgotten sorrow.

deep down you're hollow
and you know.
take off your cloak
step outside your cloud of mystery
that poorly disguises the faking
that in the end
just can't take back
all the hating you felt.
that you're experiencing.
you can't stop how you melt
how you hold out your hand
and pull it back.
it hit me harder
than you could have ever
smacked me.

sometimes i'm dead.
it's easy to mistake my heart
as lead
because that's what these walls
might as well be made of.
you can't see through
or get to the other side
it's how i hide
and keep myself from feeling
the burn.

how i plead and how i yearn
it doesn't matter
because when the blood splatters
you realize the love was
never real
was never there.
it's like ripping out my hair
to feel the break.
watching the imaginary tape
where you kidnap my feelings
and hang them from
the skylight.

forever lost in twilight
as we don't fight
how this follows and flows
how it comes out so easy
how you always
said things so sleazy.
and how i don't feel content
thinking of how you can't be
won't be
what you meant.

love michelle.