Alone

Never....Never in my life have I felt so alone...So hopeless...Completely,and utterly...alone... I have family...Friends...But that has no meaning to me anymore...Because noone will or can ever understand how I feel right now...Noone...I really AM alone,arn't I? So,So alone... In the past I liked being alone...Taking walks at night,finding peace withen the 4 walls of my room...Even in my mind,I was by myself... Ironicly,I dont want to see anyone right now...In this state of utter hopelessness...Loanlyness...I wish to see no one... I guess its just a feeling...Mood swing,maybe...But to ONLY feel this...Deprived of any other emotions...To be sitting here in the dark of my living room,with only my computer screen as a light source,and feel the total emptyness of abandonment... And know I have been forgotten...Replaced... This is the lowest I can get...I feel like I wouldent give any thought if I died right here,typing away my sorrows on this lifeless computer...Which I came to depend on as my link to the outside world...But really its just a inatament object,uncapable of love or kindness... Which is something that I have not felt in a while... I'm really pathetic...So weak and vulnerable...Unable to handle my own emotions... I am useless...Painfully useless... Its a wonder,how I live through each day as if it really mattered to me...To anyone...And still have this growing disease that is this feeling of loanlyness... So,as I sign off...Tears staining my face,leaving the dried salt in there wake... I have come to realize that I shall forever remane alone... Stuck in this so-called "Life" I lead... Goodnight to you all... ~*Lost*~