Being Used

My emotions get the better of me and i sleep with you again it means more to me than it does to you even though it feels like love it's really not to you, it's lust as i feel your body on mine it somewhow feels like ecstasy the way you kiss me and whisper in my ear it just feels so right to me, it's love to you it's just sex but it feels so right when we're so close even though it's not i sleep with you thinking we will be back together but it never happens it just seems like it means nothing to you even though we just shared something so beautiful after it happens you get up, not saying a word you just look at me with that expression on your face i ask you what it meant to you i never get an answer you just get dressed and walk out of the room i cry, i bang my head against the wall i know i've been a fool again i know when i see you, it just happens my love for you just overwhelms me and i just want to and i wish everytime that it will mean something to you that you will fall in love with me and stay after, holding me but it never happens you walk out that door, and out of my life again not saying a word and i'm left there feeling used i sit there crying, i feel dirty and in a mess to have that feeling when you know you've just been used is the most horrible feeling in the world i know you've used me again and i still love you so much Everytime i see you, my emotions somehow get the better of me and i fall for it all over again and end up being used I hate myself for it, i feel so stupid. I keep telling myself it isn't goinng to happen again but somehow it does. for ben Copyright Rebecca Waring