you ask me
what i feel
and i can only answer this

i feel like
im running
dashing
tripping and colliding
blindfolded
into the boreal
it's dark
i hear my feet
hitting ground
i hear my heart
in my ears

the scratches of branches
burn adn sting
breaking
unfixable
i dare not go back
the birds flee
the deer bound
i creat such
an enormous mess
i cuase such a horrendeous sound
in a forest so still
so quiet
till i come flying abound.

i can only reach out
and i can only scream
short bursts with every breath
the red from my arms
i see not
i feel not my legs
i can only run
i can only fight through
this mess.

i fall
and i tumbles down cliffs
blinded i climb
i've swam in lakes
so cold
rivers so fast
carried away
the fish
the leeches
attacking my feet
plants dragging my down
i can only keep swimming
i mustn't drown.

my goal is so close
i can feel it within
and when you hold me hand
the spirit sings
and i feel
warmth in the cold
dead icy chill of the 
forest winter
and i feel the wind
a cool sumemr breeze
on days so hot.

i never stop.
i dare not.
but with you here
the instants we pass
and collide
and embrace
before i push you on
i must continue
my life is a race.

they try and trip me up
the roots and loose
rocks
the spiltting pain
of stomping upon them
and i have only
blindness to blame.

the obstacles
push me back
but you lead me on
i push you away
i am not yet won
my heart beats stronger
i feel weak
but i know
that someday
soemday this must open
into something widespread..

i only hope
im running the right way
as not to be in ehre forever
only so as not
to end on the sub artic terrain
cold, heartless
myself to blame.

on yet i run
i have not time
to think
of where im going
all i know
is when im done 
screaming, drowning
bleeding and dying
for you...
my race will have been run.

xoxo
Ellie J