Most Comfortable Shoe

With your demons lingering around My head they dance and sing my name This history my history oh I won’t let it be the same My fortunes faded in the night To find myself sitting with a sprite Under the stars, I’m under the stars alone *Take me make me do something absolutely crazy Give me wings and cut off my feet, make me fly I’ve got no choice, this little voice behind all those screaming words It says free me love me take me to some undiscovered world I’m sorry for all the pain I caused in all the little lives I’ve lost And sorry for the messes I’ve been in now I’m sorry I wasn’t the daughter you wanted or the child with a smile That loved god and boys I’m a 180 of your veracious dreams and I don’t know how **So all I can say is… This life was made for me today and yesterday I’ve yelled a lot, but I’ve laughed plenty Don’t count my tears, I know they’re too many Don’t lift my burdens, they’re too heavy I’m sorry for what I fucked along the way I’m sorry there couldn’t have been more better days Maybe one day I can make it up If I get that day to make it up I wouldn’t know how to make it up Not even for myself An incubus for every memory They’ve got my number and my throat Harass me when they know I’m weakest, fuck if they let me go In all my childhood dreams I was in a different place I had a different name and a different face Child happy, I was happy dreaming I didn’t have a home * thank you for all the pain you caused and all the little times we lost and thank you for the messes you put me in now thank you for being that kind of mother and father, that family, friend, and my little brother I could have been a 180 of my veracious self and I don’t know how ** not even for myself… I don’t regret, I just have pain I wish every day it could just rain And wash away the uncountable tears And drown away all these stupid fears Cool these burning wounds when they’re too hot Make me grow or I’ll just rot I can’t just sit here I won’t just sit here… I want to feel happiness at it’s finest I want to reach my being at it’s highest I want to feel a touch and not deny it I want to say those words instead of hide it I want to feel the wind beneath my wings And all those happy little cliché things I can’t just sit here I won’t just sit here So all I can say is… This life was made for me today and tomorrow I’ve climbed in glee and fell in sorrow Don’t count my tears, I know they’re too many Don’t lift my burdens, they’re too heavy Thank you for trying, but I’ll keep steady I’ll make it up the days I’m ready Every single day seems a little meeker Which gives me the drive to run in sneakers Who needs wings, I’ve got two legs They’ll get me to places I’ve never been And one day when I’m not human I’ll be ready to fly out of a place I’ve been doomed in I can’t just sit here… 2004