Grandma Schizophrenia, by Sandwich Massacre
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grandma was a happy schizophrenic
she was never bored
she talked to the mirror
she talked to the floor
she swore that the three coyotes
named harald, simon and bill
told her about dead puppies
every night at her window sill
and the dead puppies were actually not dead puppies
for they were just a clan
of one eyed purple kitty cats
that came to earth to destroy man
despite the coyotes warnings
grandma didn't have a care in the world
for she was guarded by martian golems
and she swore she was super girl
she even wore the tights
and ran in on gas station thefts
she jumped on bad guys till she broke her back
which led her to her death
so this happy schizophrenic
lived an adventurous life
she wrestled crocodiles
and swam with sharks
she was even bill gate's wife
she swore she had the riches
that anyone would dream
for she was an exotic dancing ballerina
and she invented whipped cream
so at grandma's funeral
everyone would say
this woman was a psycho
for thinking that on februaries she was Man Ray
but she was still quite the photographer
and though we couldn't see her friends
why did she have so much money
and why was there coyote hair in her bed?
although she was really old
the news reporters say
3 banks were saved from robbery
by a woman in red tights and hair gray
so despite her psychotic tendencies
her entire family knew
that grandma's adventures and shenanigans
just might be kind of true
they buried her in the cemetery
and her tombstone does read
"don't judge me by my actions and words
judge by what you've seen"
and so on that same day her daughter went into labor
and gave birth to a healthy girl
at the age of 4 she drew pictures of coyotes and golems
and dreamed of saving the world
by 7 she was diagnosed
with early stages of schizophrenia
for listening to the coyotes that told her
to save people with bulemia
she approached these skinny people
and said that they must have food
they must escape from what is holding them
they must be in a joyous mood
for they have 3 dead puppies
chewing at their feet
and it is these 3 dead puppies
that make them throw up their meat
and the remedy is to wear clean
socks and chew on their toes
and balance carrot sticks with strawberry marshmellow fluff
on top of their nose
she swore up and down that it was the cure
and that no one could see
:these dead puppies on the bulemic's feet
one two three
she was on medications
but each family member knew
:grandma's powers were past down to her
and she would one day save the world
2004 |
Posted: 2005-11-06 16:44:29 UTC |
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2005-10-27 21:51:57 | . QUEENIE . |
that was really cool. props. |