Messy Subjects (Part One).
By .xx:+.Disposable.Darling.+:xx. •
it's christmas and
i don't wanna be another girlfriend
you hide in your room.
it's that "special" time of year
that no one cares the meaning of
but i still want you to
want to show me off.
champagne and orange juice
with jealousy and envy
i call a truce.
it might not be very real to you
but it's real to me.
i can feel it, i can see.
you're standing there
and i'm wondering if i chose
the right thing to wear.
you swear on your heart and all you adore
but that doesn't make me
any less square.
could this be a bad thing?
even though it won't happen tonight.
i feel less numb
now that we've started to fight.
{it's not a big fairy tale anymore
do you feel it too?}
it eats me up
everytime it gets more and closer
to being real.
if only one of us feels
is it really worth it all?
i'm not calling you a fake
because i'm the fake.
but you did forget to call.
{deliberately, i know.}
happening a lot lately
your head HAPPENS to be..
it's nothing.
because you roll it up
and smoke it away
and you do this every single fucking day.
so i don't bother to say
because you won't remember
the way i will have intended you to.