Hurricanes Die In Fury, by Loneliness is condescending
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Your would revolves around the I
Stuck in silence left behind
Conversations slowly escalate
Walls surrounding everywhere
Playing favorites, no ones here
Even with the voices rising
And an echo hollow feeling
To them your I does not relate
The odd man out in a room of misfits
Broken hope this is not the life
A hurricane of screams forming off the soul
Building up a friendless storm
The I of my world has collapsed
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Posted: 2007-08-08 04:32:45 UTC |
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2006-04-18 18:24:33 | lost the lonely dead |
the odd man out in a room of misfits *thumbs up* i like this...my suggestions would be- your world twils consumed around the eye/ talk escalades peaceful as a growing storm/ Walls surround on all sides/ Playing favorites, none beside me/ Even has tension is rising/ there resounds a hollowness/ Those beyond these walls cannot compaire/ Genocide led by misfits youre in the crosshairs/ Broken hope is this the life?/ A hurricane of frost screams from the soul/ Gently adding to a friendly storm/ Exploding for lack of a reason/ the I of my world has collapsed...........just some thoughts.. |
2006-05-20 20:28:17 | Crimson.Wings |
God job. The poem flows very well and is really elaborate. |
2006-09-02 21:31:34 | j-ay rose |
the creativity put into writing this makes me smile and think, 'now this is a worthwhile writer.' its not every day you find someone willing to play around with words. well done. |