My pain..., by these cuts kill.., by Thoughtless Encounters
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My love was unconditional
My love was so pure
All I wanted was for you to love me
But now you’ve walked out of the door
You said that you loved me
And I believed every word
If id known you were such a bastard
Maybe I wouldn’t have gotten hurt
My life is so silent
Nothing makes a sound
I was scared to speak up
In case you’d give me another pound
You toyed with my heart
And you knew how it felt
But somehow I kept coming back
To the nasty cards you dealt
Now I’m scared to look in the mirror
I'm way too scared to see
The scars that I keep hidden
From the pain you brought to me
You would hurt me
Inside my own head
But gradually it became to
Hurting me on my own bed
I peel off the quilt sheets
To see what I can find
And I see the bloody stains
One of the things you left behind
You sexually abused me
I realize that then and now
But I didn’t speak up
I didn’t know how
This pain you passed onto me
Is buried in my soul
Sometimes it comes out to play
Afterwards you see a bloody hole
You gave me pain
So I gave myself more
I couldn’t deal with the stress
It sunk into my pores
No matter how much I scrubbed my body
Your germs are always there
They’re imprinted in my soul,
And that’s something I must bare
I’m trying to fill the gaps
That you forced to crack
But no matter how much I try
I know ill always go back
I cut my wrist to feel it
This pain so comforting, so real
My body relaxes greatly
The only way I can feel
I know deep down I hate you
And I know that you’re to blame
But when I cry at night
I know you’re the devil I must tame
You may be far away now
You’re gone but not forgotten
You’ll be the reason I die
Because inside I’m rotten
This pain is becoming too much
I can no longer hold it in
The scars are getting too big to hide
I think I’m about to give in
I swore I wouldn’t let you win
But now it seems you have
Congratulations! You’re the winner!
Now seal me inside this body bag
I wonder at my funeral
Who would even come?
Would they come out of respect?
Or for a bit of fun?
I don’t want to be involved
In any more of you’re games
Run away and laugh at me
And call me those nasty names
One day it would have bothered me
One day I would have cared
But I caused my own pain
Which caused you to stare
My own messy bloodbath
Which pours along the floor
Maybe death will succumb to me
And I will hurt no more.
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Posted: 2006-01-26 07:40:13 UTC |
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