My pain..., by these cuts kill..

My love was unconditional My love was so pure All I wanted was for you to love me But now you’ve walked out of the door You said that you loved me And I believed every word If id known you were such a bastard Maybe I wouldn’t have gotten hurt My life is so silent Nothing makes a sound I was scared to speak up In case you’d give me another pound You toyed with my heart And you knew how it felt But somehow I kept coming back To the nasty cards you dealt Now I’m scared to look in the mirror I'm way too scared to see The scars that I keep hidden From the pain you brought to me You would hurt me Inside my own head But gradually it became to Hurting me on my own bed I peel off the quilt sheets To see what I can find And I see the bloody stains One of the things you left behind You sexually abused me I realize that then and now But I didn’t speak up I didn’t know how This pain you passed onto me Is buried in my soul Sometimes it comes out to play Afterwards you see a bloody hole You gave me pain So I gave myself more I couldn’t deal with the stress It sunk into my pores No matter how much I scrubbed my body Your germs are always there They’re imprinted in my soul, And that’s something I must bare I’m trying to fill the gaps That you forced to crack But no matter how much I try I know ill always go back I cut my wrist to feel it This pain so comforting, so real My body relaxes greatly The only way I can feel I know deep down I hate you And I know that you’re to blame But when I cry at night I know you’re the devil I must tame You may be far away now You’re gone but not forgotten You’ll be the reason I die Because inside I’m rotten This pain is becoming too much I can no longer hold it in The scars are getting too big to hide I think I’m about to give in I swore I wouldn’t let you win But now it seems you have Congratulations! You’re the winner! Now seal me inside this body bag I wonder at my funeral Who would even come? Would they come out of respect? Or for a bit of fun? I don’t want to be involved In any more of you’re games Run away and laugh at me And call me those nasty names One day it would have bothered me One day I would have cared But I caused my own pain Which caused you to stare My own messy bloodbath Which pours along the floor Maybe death will succumb to me And I will hurt no more.