I wish 
I could
disappear 
into the night
without a trace.
you not 
knowing where
I went.
or why I left.
out of this bed 
and into the world.
out of my mind 
and into my hands.
my memories of 
a painful past,
all the lies
telling me
that it isnt wrong
or it wont hurt
it wont
scar me.

I wish 
my memories
and my life 
could disappear,
with you. 
I've tried 
many many times
to forget
all that you've done,
but
I cant. 
I wish 
you could 
disappear
too.
Nobody knows what
happened to you
nobody knows
what you put me through
nobody now
knows where I am.
Suspicions arroused
I giggle
it's a great plan.

If only
my memories
my past
would disappear.

I wish 
I could 
disappear
into the night without
a trace. 

My cuts 
disappear 
slowly into scars.

I wish 
it were 
true to say
you've disappeared..
with goes
with my dreams.
my innocence.
my wishes.
my smile.
my life.
and my memories.

I want to disappear
and make you feel the pain
then pain inside myself
that I secrety fear.


xoxo
Ellie J