i idolized you
i looked up to you
i imagined you
being everything
and you were
yes, you were
at least, for me
i loved you
i spent so much time
just loving you
i was hoping you
love me, too
but hoping is for
lovers
and i am left without
i poured so much time
i remained so loyal
so consistent
so steadfast
so forgiving
days spilled into weeks
weeks poured into months
months flooded into years
i can't distinguish
one for the next
but i have never forgotten
a word that you've said
never in my life
has anyone meant so much
i've taught myself 
not to shed a tear for you
i am so used to disappointments
it seems almost routine
just sitting here
like an idiot
waiting for the phone to ring
and knowing it wont
i should have given up already
should have known that i'd
be stood up
be dismissed
be shrugged off
be pushed to the side
left
abandoned
forgotten
alone
used
broken
unloved
unappreciated
unsatisfied
unsatisfying
i knew it was a dream
still, i tried
can you blame a girl for trying?
i guess it was all just
a misunderstanding
i thought i had it all right
i guess i was wrong