you have ruined me
i have come undone because of you
it was all you
and it is too dark
i am out of my skin
uncomfortable
unaccustomed
you have uprooted me
from the place that was so familiar
and it is too cold
you have taken everything
the words of regret stab into me
and i am not in existence
not anymore
thanks to you
or no thanks
i should never have looked you in the eyes
and if i could take everything back
i would try
oh, how i would try
because the memory of you has haunted me
it has haunted me in my sleep
a smell
the back of a stranger's head
and you come to mind again
i don't want to think about it
no, i don't want to think about it
anything but this
anything but you
do not flatter yourself; i do not fear you
i only dread the memories
that i was so accustomed to
now i am left here, in this foreign place
with nothing to hold on to
i have no grip, no life, no hope
you have taken everything
and i want to be rid of you and your smile
your voice - your whisper
i hate you
maybe not
maybe i don't
i've never despised anyone before
and i will not start with you