It's been awhile since the last time I was able to write,
Because all this time I've been going through a fight,
A fight through Hell, in which people call life,
That many soon realize is easy to end with a knife,
A lot of times it's tempting because of the way life is,
Like in certain situations when you think in your head "How
the hell am I gonna do this?"
What's next?
Can I past the test?
Will I do my best
 and is my best better than all the rest,
Man I don't know,
I just feel that my heart is broke,
And that I need to let go,
On to the things in life that make me weak,
That makes my head spin and my skin creep,
Creep in crawl,
Try to ball before I fall,
From trying to stand to tall,
When I don't have the will,
And no love I can feel,
No lie, I try to keep it real,
And no to others this is no big deal,
But to me life is numb because my heart feels like ice cold
steel,
Whats the appeal,
The way things are in my essence,
The way I felt with her in my presence,
I want it but don't need it,
My heart screams love but I refuse to feed it,
Because when things come to worse,
And you let yourself love and then get hurt,
Which always happens in the end,
With some type of friend,
That if they asked for another chance you'd give it to them
again and again,
Yes it's true in life I try,
But I live to die,
Unlike a trained spy,
In any situation,
To me comes devastation,
I wanna get away from all this, and just be lost,
And as I hold on to this cross,
I sit here and pray in the end, my life is not the cost.